Ebook Obscene Thoughts: A Pornographer's Perspective on Sex, Love, and Dating, by Dave Pounder
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Obscene Thoughts: A Pornographer's Perspective on Sex, Love and Dating examines progressive, intellectual and academic constructs regarding mate selection, sexual behavior and the reasons why people cheat. Obscene Thoughts investigates and deconstructs core socioeconomic and biological values and the sexual behaviors of men and women, in a fresh, distinct manner.
- Sales Rank: #111226 in Audible
- Published on: 2013-10-15
- Format: Unabridged
- Original language: English
- Running time: 549 minutes
Most helpful customer reviews
13 of 13 people found the following review helpful.
The author is even more cynical than I am
By agent fluffy
I guess the paid reviews on Amazon and other sites are part of the game nowadays. This isn't one of them.
I'm a guy who's read a lot of evolutionary psychology, and I thought this was pretty good. The problem was that I already knew most of what was in the book, although most people probably don't. I was hoping for some kind of reconciliation and solution to the battle-of-the-sexes mentality, but the author is even more cynical than I am.
If you've read authors like David Buss, websites like bakadesuyo, and "manosphere" stuff like the red pill or roissy(heartiste), you are probably decently well-versed in the concepts this book proposes... Although this book has a more palatable tone, it still felt like reading the redpill subreddit, albeit with less fluff.
I would have liked more focus on what the porn industry taught him, because that is his unique selling point. The stuff about abused women being promiscuous could have used more citation and elaboration. A lot of the book seemed to be sort of anecdotal or inferred, which is still valid, but not ideal. However, I think evo-psych in general is plagued by over-reliance on surveys and difficulty of performing empirical research. I wouldn't have minded if the author had blatantly thrown in many more anecdotes, as long as he was clear that that's all they were.
I'm curious how the author intends to proceed with relationships now that he has written a book which blatantly and repeatedly tells men to cheat but lie about it. The fact that he would shoot himself in the foot by writing such a book makes me wonder whether he is more idealistic than he lets on. (Prioritizing honesty and the search for truth over his own reproductive success?)
Despite my criticisms, I enjoyed reading a book by a fellow evo-psych nut, who never censors himself for political correctness' sake. I find it hard to disagree with the main tenets of this book, although I wish I could, because my idealism comes into conflict with them; I like honesty.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
Incredibly Self-serving Thoughts
By Patricia A. Maxwell
The author’s many years in the porn industry has undoubtedly fostered this deeply cynical approach to male-female relationships. In his view, all men immediately want intercourse with every attractive woman they see, and all women judge the men they meet by the size of their bank accounts. He feels a woman owes a man sex in return for the money spent courting her with restaurants outings, jewelry and flowers, and any waiting period before falling into his bed is for appraising his financial standing. If a woman doesn’t intend to “put out,” he maintains, then she should pay the restaurant tab! He discounts male-female chemistry or romantic love, equating marriage with the simple exchange of sexual access for monetary benefit – a legal form of prostitution, in other words. Adultery, in his view is to be expected as men are at the mercy of their hormones – a point he makes over and over again. A wife who gains weight or ages should expect her mate to stray –it’s her fault because men are naturally attracted to younger, svelte women instead of older, overweight ones. The secret to a successful marriage, then, is for a wife to turn a blind eye to her mate’s inevitable infidelity, neither questioning him about it nor investigating his suspicious activities. If their “happy” home is destroyed due to his straying, it’s not the fault of the husband but of the wife for making a big deal out it! Oh, but it’s also natural for a man to exchange his aging wife for a new, younger model, something she should apparently accept with humility and gratitude for any financial compensation. Yes, and it's normal, as well, for a husband to be murderously incensed if the neglected wife dares step out on him, calling into question the paternity of "his" children.
How many ways can this author be wrong? Let me count them. Or no, let’s just call BS on this rationalization for the actions of immature, egotistical males who are too weak to control their sexual impulses, and too cowardly and dishonorable to make any form of commitment, much less one to last a lifetime.
10 of 12 people found the following review helpful.
An interesting and candid perspective on the sexual behaviors of men and women.
By Todd Jenkins
This book takes an honest and often humorous approach in interpreting the sexual behaviors of men and women at various stages of life (dating, marriage, etc.). Many of the concepts presented in this book, which are obvious to me as a male, are actually quite foreign to women (such as the analogies of food and sex); conversely, some of the concepts that are so obvious to women were actually quite foreign to me (and, I assume, to most other men). People should read this book not to better understand their own behavior, which will seem obvious to them, but to understand the motivations and desires of the other gender, since what is obvious to them is clearly not so obvious to us. Highly recommended read!
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